It always amazes me when I get profoundly surprised by people I know, or think I know anyway. You have this idea of someone, you think you know who they are, how they would behave, how they would react to certain situations and then, they behave totally differently to what you thought.
Sometimes people surprise you pleasantly. They show you you've underestimated them. You think they might not live up to what the circumstances demand of them, but they do. You think they might fuck up, but they don't. You think they might get scared and walk away when the goings get tough, but they don't. And then you have to take a step back, reassess and revaluate.
Some other times though, people surprise you negatively. They show you you've overestimated them. You think they're cool, and they're not. You think they are gracious and polite and they're not. You think they are strong and honest, and they're not. And then you have to take a step back, reassess and revaluate.
How do you distance yourself from people that have been your friends for years, but have let you down. Not let you down because of something they did to you, but because of who they are, or who they've let themselves become. How do you tell someone, sorry I don't like you anymore. I thought you were better, I thought you were cool.
I find it extremely difficult to do that, because at the end of the day, it's not even the other person's fault if you misjudged them. If you thought they were someone they're not. If you, at the end of the day, possibly superimposed a different character on them, a character different on who they really were.
Or even worse, it's not their fault if they just changed into something you no longer like.
1 comment:
Yeah, the same thing happened to me. I drove all the way to me bloody Grandmothers' house one day, because I thought she would give me money! I even stayed there a while. When I left, what did I get? Squat, zilt, nada. What's up with that?
This is what I think happened. I needed money and because my Grandmother always gave me money when I went there, I thought this time was no different. But, it was. She hadn't changed, I had. She gave me money when I was a child, more often then, than now.
I should have asked. It would have saved me all that time and thought. Or simply I could have gone there and enjoy the company.
Every now and then we have to ask our friends [not the best ones], to get a clearer picture. A problem occurs when the answers are somewhat different.
Yeah.
Post a Comment