Εσυ κερδίζεις μάνα μου και κύπελλο Ουέφα

I know I've been a bad girl lately

I know I've been a bad girl lately:

- I post once in a blue moon (literally)
- I post uninspired, sad vs. angry posts
- I feel the world is against me

In a desperate attempt to wake up my non-existent readers, I am posting twice in two days: a-ma-zing.

In an additional desperate attempt to cheer us all up, I am introducing you to X-factor guardian's liveblog

For anyone not from the UK, this is the most serious newspaper blogging for X-facor/scum of the earth TV. But it's amazing. It's funny, it's clever, it's indispensable.

Which makes me think, does the fact that I am reading the guardian cancel out the shame of watching X-factor?

Youkali once said to me a wise thing (one of many): even intellectual people need to embrace shitty popular culture once and a while. Pretending to be an intellectual all my life, and always having an identity crisis when I liked so much TV crap, I felt instantly better. You?

Which brings me to this post's final point: because we need a balance in life, and because I desperately need to keep up with the intellectual pretenses, I started reading "the count of monte christo" last night. The original. The one with the 50000 pages. You can of course always ask what type of intellectual has still not read this book at the age of 33. That's an easy one, I'd say: a fake one.

Anyway, have a good Sunday people. Ah and wake up please, send me a comment.
Am I alone in all this?

The fear

What is it about fear that makes people so human less?
Normal people, your friends, your colleagues, people you've known for a while, when fear strikes them you cannot recognise them anymore.

Fear can do two things to a man: either paralyse or make them entirely vicious amoral and cruel.

These are difficult times, people have no money, there is crisis everywhere, recession makes it all dark, there is no hope, people's lives might change.

Fear has crept in, everyone is feeling it now, and there's classic each man for himself.

How foolish mankind is. Always the same. Man eat man. And then what is left? After the crisis and the recession are over? After we go back to a so called normality? Where do we go back to, when so called friends have turned against each other?

Fuck it all.
We are born alone.

Art saves

In a time when education means nothing - art saves.

In a world where beauty equals fake boobs - art saves.

In a world where dancing is fake - art saves.

In a world where noone reads books anymore - art saves.

In a world where movies are hollywood blockbusters only -art saves.



God save Pina Bausch. Wim Wenders, Pedro Almodovar, Julian Barnes, Euripides and even JK Rowling.

God save the bourgeoisie that still thinks that art matters.

Art matters because Art saves.

The endless sameness of the days

One more week under way. Next week I'll be calmer, I thought last Tuesday. But this Tuesday came and went and calmer I am not. Week after week, I am stressed. I have no time to read. I have no time to write. I prepare things at the last minute. Badly. And then I struggle to make them work.

Every week I say, next week I'll feel myself again. Next week I won't run around like a headless chicken. Next week I'll have a bit of time. And next week comes, and still, I go around like a headless chicken.

When I have no time, I freeze. I feel tired constantly and I don't want to get a proper break. I try to work but I can't. I get the unproductive stress, I go from one thing to the next, doing nothing well. I spend hours on the internet, reading shit. Feeling instantly guilty for that, feeling worse.

The only thing that calms me down is a bit of time. Taking some time to write my list, cross things off one by one, feel that my in-tray is getting emptier. Even if it's not.

These are hard times: they make you feel that it's a privilege to have a job that's why you need to work your ass off.
But it's not a privilege, it's really not. When I die, I will not say, I was privileged enough to have a job. I might say, I was privileged to meet wonderful people, to have an interesting life, to feel love. Not to fucking work.

I am angry and confused. I haven't written anything about the financial situation of the world, of Greece, mostly because I am not sure I will write something profound enough. But here is the thing: this is not a normal world. This world is going to hell. This whole shit is not normal. People have the right to live without feeling thankful that someone is not shooting them dead.

Anyway, this post is now definitely verging on the utterly incoherent, but what can I do? Delete it and pretend it never existed? No way.

(Besides it makes me feel so revolutionary to write "fuck" like this all over the place)