Never thought I'd be defining myself as such, but this is what I am, innit? A Greek living abroad, for 12 years no less. Sounds freaky, if you ask me. In my head I'm still 19 years-old for God's sake. I can't be living so many years away from Greece...
Anyway, it gets to you though, doesn't it? I often wonder, do I even still count as Greek? I mean, I'm Greek and all, but not really. For once I can't vote: I am not allowed to vote at an embassy, and I can't afford to travel back to Greece whenever there are elections. The nasty thing about this is: should I even have the right to? I vote for a Greek government from the comfort of my Belfast home and other people pay the taxes... Anyway, I digress and that's a separate issue.
Then, I often forget my language: I think in English, I write in English, I dream in English often. I read books in English, and I always litter my Greek with English words. I also don't feel too close to my Greek roots: I don't understand Greek people sometimes, they feel alien to me. I definitely don't like hanging out with them abroad: most of them seem to me to be moany, annoying brats that complain about the weather and the lack of frapé in coffee shops. Boring. Then there's the food: how can you cook proper Greek food without the fresh ingredients. I think I am making a good imam baildi but when I make it for my dad he complains it's too light, too this, too that, definitely not like how my grandmother made it.
So, the question of identity remains. I sure as hell am not English or Northern Irish, even if I've lived in England for 5 years and here for the rest. Even if I adore the Great British bake off (how very British, no?) and I think the Guardian is a national institution. But more and more I feel I'm this weird hybrid, this different person, this in-between character.
Now is this good or bad, I don't know...
Anyway, it gets to you though, doesn't it? I often wonder, do I even still count as Greek? I mean, I'm Greek and all, but not really. For once I can't vote: I am not allowed to vote at an embassy, and I can't afford to travel back to Greece whenever there are elections. The nasty thing about this is: should I even have the right to? I vote for a Greek government from the comfort of my Belfast home and other people pay the taxes... Anyway, I digress and that's a separate issue.
Then, I often forget my language: I think in English, I write in English, I dream in English often. I read books in English, and I always litter my Greek with English words. I also don't feel too close to my Greek roots: I don't understand Greek people sometimes, they feel alien to me. I definitely don't like hanging out with them abroad: most of them seem to me to be moany, annoying brats that complain about the weather and the lack of frapé in coffee shops. Boring. Then there's the food: how can you cook proper Greek food without the fresh ingredients. I think I am making a good imam baildi but when I make it for my dad he complains it's too light, too this, too that, definitely not like how my grandmother made it.
So, the question of identity remains. I sure as hell am not English or Northern Irish, even if I've lived in England for 5 years and here for the rest. Even if I adore the Great British bake off (how very British, no?) and I think the Guardian is a national institution. But more and more I feel I'm this weird hybrid, this different person, this in-between character.
Now is this good or bad, I don't know...
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