I am always busy. Have no time for anything. Is this right? Is this how it's supposed to be? Today i was teaching for 6 hours, my throat hurts like mad and i feel drowsy. I go to work every week feeling like a phoney, i know i should be doing so much more than I am, my lectures could be so much better, my control over my life and my work could be so much better. But still I am, like always, a last-minute person. Will this ever change? Will I ever become this perfectionist who finishes things well in advance and feels on top of things? I don't know. And I don't care. All I want is for this term to end, so I can sit and do nothing for a couple of weeks, feel like myself again and try better next time.
Something tells me however that I will be writing a similar post in April....
I don't want to leave you with my grumpiness though, so here is lady gaga in her new, outrageous video where she wears skimpier clothes and dances like a cross between thriller and twist and shout. Genius or dramatically overdone?
2 comments:
The more control you want, the less control you have. Just, let go.
That's all
I find it amazing how we can negotiate with ourselves and agree that we will be busy for a given period (say 1 month, 1 semester, 1 year) because then we are sure we will be more relaxed. There is so much free time waiting for us at the end to catch up with everything we left behind; only to find ourselves still busy after that negotiated period and more white hair growing in our hair. Funny how we try to remain in control of our busy lives...
..after all this is our productive period in life, lets make the most of it!
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